From the Beginning - Matthew 19:1–15
Continuing in Matthew, the Pharisees are trying to bring down Jesus, to trap him. They want to catch him contradicting Moses and the OT law. So, they use a question about divorce. Now, Jesus had already spoken publicly about divorce. Matthew records it in chapter 5. Jesus says, [31] “It was also said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ That’s from Deuteronomy 24, written by Moses. Jesus goes on to say, [32] But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.”
Jesus gave this command on divorce because Jewish men were using these words of Moses to justify divorce for any reason. At first glance, it may seem that Jesus contradicts Moses and the law. And the Pharisees try to use this against Jesus. Notice verse [3] And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful to divorce one's wife for any cause?”
Now, Moses never said that divorce for any cause was lawful. They added that phrase as part of the set-up. But look at verse 4, Jesus “answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, [5] and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? [6] So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”
Jesus appeals to an era that was pre-Moses. He goes back to “the beginning,” to the creation of the world. And in doing so, Jesus makes the case for the sanctity of marriage - in other words, the sacred nature of it - on the basis that marriage was created by God not only for the multiplication of the human race, but also as foundational to the human race. At the beginning of humans, there was a marriage. When ministers perform marriage ceremonies, we quote these words. Marriage belongs to God, he created it, and therefore severing a marriage is not ideal.
Yet in Deut. 24, Moses does refer to this “certificate of divorce.” But did Moses promote divorce? Look at verse [7], the Pharisees “said to him, “Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?” Many Jews had been twisting Moses’ words to validate their divorces over trivial matters. But verse [8] He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. Jesus explains that Moses made a concession because of the sinfulness of people. Basically, Moses knew that because of sin, people were going to divorce. But that didn’t mean that Moses condoned it or endorsed it. The instructions of Deut. 24 told the people how to handle it. But look at verse 9 here. Jesus reiterates what he said back in Matthew ch. 5: Verse [9] And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”
Jesus manages to do two things in verse 8 and 9. First thing, he corrects their view of marriage and divorce. Again, divorce is never ideal, but it is allowable in the case of adultery and sexual immorality. But it’s never ideal, never preferred. It is a concession made in a sinful world. And for that reason, we all need to see the second thing that Jesus manages to do here. He goes deeper to deal to an issue prevalent in the heart and life of every believer. You may think that because your mind is made up about divorce and you agree with Jesus that these verses don’t really speak to you. But they do. Here’s why: because Jesus discerns in the Pharisees’ questions about divorce that they are deceived about the difference between a concession and a principle.
Think about the fact that God loves his people and remains faithful to us even though we continually sin. Think about the reality that a holy God has bound himself to his people by grace, by his undeserved favor. He saves us through the substitutionary atonement of Jesus Christ: in other words, Jesus’ living, dying, rising from the dead in your place. So, God sees those who are born again as righteous by his grace. Therefore as a believer, you can sin but not lose your salvation. Through grace, God made a way for a relationship of peace between Him and you.
However, does grace mean that we can and should sin freely without a care? Does it mean we should allow sin to remain in our lives? No, we should not, because to understand how we should live our lives today, we don’t look only to the concession God has made by his grace since the Fall of man. We look back to the beginning. We look to the created order, before the Fall of man into sin.
In the beginning, humans were created to live for the glory of God. We were made to delight in Him above all else. We were made to join Him in what He is doing in the world He created. Joining him in this and knowing him personally was to be our greatest delight. It’s not a cliche to say that God is our reason for living. Our existence makes no sense apart from Him. Our lives have no lasting purpose apart from him. In the beginning, their lives revolved around relationship with Him and the purpose He gave them. Knowing him and being known by him was to be their greatest joy. That’s how it was from the beginning. And that’s why the order of creation sets the standard for how we should live. These Pharisees were abusing the concession God had made.
How often do you approach your life that way? Do you abuse God’s grace to justify sin in your life? God does not extend grace to sinners so we can go on living in darkness. He raised us from the dead along with Jesus so we could walk in newness of life. Therefore, we must put all sin to death in our lives - even our pet sins. You know about your pet sins, right? Those are the ones that keep hanging around, and you’ve more or less given up on God changing you. You just are the way you are.
Maybe you rationalize by saying, “Well, nobody’s perfect.” But the apostle Peter quoted these words of God from OT law to the NT church: “Be holy because I am holy.” Pursue holiness. Mourn over your sin; hate it. Aim to rid your life of it and walk in newness of life. True followers of Jesus don’t just go on sinning without concern, chalking it all up to grace. True followers evaluate everything in and about their lives in light of God’s holy standard. You might say, but Stacey, that seems impossible. Well, in your own strength, it is. The Scriptures are clear that we will never be totally sinless on this side of the grave. But if we would experience the power of the Holy Spirit of God in our church and homes and neighborhoods and everywhere, we must pursue it. And these next verses point out that we need the grace of God to do it, because
the grace of God makes a way for us to pursue that standard today.
Look at verse [10] The disciples said to him, “If such is the case of a man with his wife,
it is better not to marry.” It’s hard to say if they were being cynical, or if their words were tongue-in-cheek. “Jesus, you’re saying I’m stuck with this person for life!” “For life” is the idea. But it’s not easy. Marriage is not easy. Two sinful people coming together for life.
So is it better to stay single? For some people, yes. Not for others. Jesus clarifies, verse 11: But he said to them, “Not everyone can receive this saying, but only those to whom it is given. [12] For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let the one who is able to receive this receive it.” Jesus uses the term “eunuch” broadly to refer to those who for various reasons do not marry.
The point is that not everyone is called by God to the lifelong commitment of marriage. Some people are pre-cluded from marriage by physical causes, and others choose to be single to advance the kingdom of God in the world. Either way, however, we rely completely on the grace of God to live the life to which he calls us. And Jesus told us back in Matthew 18 how we must go about our lives. Jesus said, “unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. [4] Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.”
It’s no coincidence that just after this dialogue about marriage and divorce, which is very much a dialogue about sin and God’s grace, that people bring little children to Jesus. Look at verse [13] Then children were brought to him that he might lay his hands on them and pray. The disciples rebuked the people, [14] but Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.” [15] And he laid his hands on them and went away.
We would all benefit from more of the humility and dependence that we see in little children. Seeing them run and play last night at the Fall Gathering, completely reliant on their parents. Last Sunday, I circled back to some previous passages in Acts and Matthew to talk about fasting. I wanted to continue talking about it this week as we move toward a season of prayer with fasting together as a church. Jesus’ words in Matthew 19 are entirely relevant to why we would fast. We would fast and pray that we might humble ourselves and become more like little children before our God; that we might rely more on grace while not abusing it; that we might put sin to death more in our lives.
What is the danger if we don’t do these things? Well, we may be saved, but the Spirit’s power will be absent from our lives. In Ephesians 4, Paul tells the church, [30] do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. In 1 Thess. 5, Paul says, [19] Do not quench the Spirit. Endulging in sin, delighting in your idols over the living God, and caving into anything that dishonors God quenches the power of the Holy Spirit in you.
I recently heard Dr. Douglas Kelly say, “The Holy Spirit is the power and the strength of the church in every age.” We need the Spirit’s power in our marriages, in our homes and relationships, at our jobs, in our private lives, in our church. John Owen wrote, “Be killing sin or it will be killing you.” It’ll kill your marriage. It’ll kill a church. Sin is killing Christianity in America today because Christians have turned a concession into a principle. We’ve turned God’s grace into a ticket to love the world. And we’ve grieved the Holy Spirit and quenched His power in and among us. And it’s time for that to stop.
So look again at God’s grace today - look again at Jesus today - with fresh eyes. Remember him who saved you and what he saved you from. Your personal sin. Your history, your past, your habits and addictions. And rejoice again in his grace. And if you’ve never tasted that grace, the Lord Jesus stands ready to receive you. His blood is sufficient to take away all your sin - past, present, and future. But you must trust in him alone; you must put your faith in him. Cry out to him, like a little children calling out in need.
Let’s pray together.